Jennifer Mulder’s Story
CFS - Fibromyalgia
“Nowadays, I still try to improve my well-being and fitness levels by spending time in nature and ‘exercise snacking’ – adding small bursts of movement into your day instead of longer workouts – but in my mind, I’ve reached my own definition of recovery, and I’m proud how far I’ve come. ”
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● Epstein-Barr virus
● Genetic predisposition
● The hormonal changes and emotions during puberty
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● Juvenile rheumatism
● ME/CFS
● Fibromyalgia
● Irritable bowel syndrome
● Asthma
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● Anti-inflammatory diet
● Massage therapy and acupuncture
● Deep relaxation (breathing exercises, mindful body scan, short meditations)
● Walk training
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● Over 15 years
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Became sick at 13 with mononucleosis from Epstein-Barr virus.
Diagnosed with juvenile arthritis, managed with NSAIDs but pain persisted.
Gradually developed fatigue, whole-body pain, and overall sickness.
Became mostly housebound during final two school years, experiencing "painsomnia" and disrupted body clock.
Diagnosed with ME/CFS and fibromyalgia after consulting a specialist.
Tried various treatments including rehabilitation, antibiotics, and alternative remedies with no success.
Managed to finish school through self-study despite health challenges.
Shifted focus from trying to get better to living life with chronic illness.
Studied Psychology part-time from home, managed daily tasks despite pain and low energy.
Met husband, traveled, and did Psychology internship but faced physical limitations.
Defined own recovery as walking 5km, working part-time without flare-ups, and having an action plan.
Adopted anti-inflammatory diet, regular massages, acupuncture, and mindful micro-breaks.
Designed walk training program to increase mobility and fitness slowly.
Tapered off medications after almost two years of lifestyle changes.
Improved health during pregnancy due to lowered immune response.
Can now actively play with kids and work part-time as a psychologist.
No longer meet diagnostic criteria for illnesses and no longer feel ill.
Continue to improve well-being and fitness
Reached personal definition of recovery despite lingering effects of illness.
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Jennifer’s Links:
Jennifers’s Website: The Health Sessions
How I became chronically ill as a teenager
In the late ‘90’s, I was a Dutch teenage girl living in Belgium, when I suddenly became sick. At 13 years old, I got mononucleosis from the Epstein-Barr virus. After a week of being in bed with a high fever and swollen lymph nodes, I wanted to pick up my usual routines and go back to school, but I just couldn’t. I ended up staying at home with exhaustion and general malaise for 3 months until things somewhat returned to normal again.
But all this time, my shoulders and neck kept hurting, with a burning pain that couldn’t be eased with an aspirin or massage therapy. When the pain spread to my back and rib cage and I again was in too much agony to go to school, my parents took me to see a rheumatologist, who diagnosed me with juvenile arthritis.
The NSAID’s prescribed did reduce the inflammation in my joints, but couldn’t fully take away the pain and morning stiffness. For 1,5 years I could almost function like a normal teenager, before gradually the fatigue, whole-body pain and that overall feeling of being sick came creeping in again.
“ I didn’t want to spend the little energy I had on hospital visits, therapies and talking about my symptoms any more. I want to live life – with and despite of my health problems. ”
More diagnoses…
During my final two school years, I was mostly housebound. With a burning right shoulder and a stabbing pain in my left ribcage, I would toss and turn all night trying to find a comfortable way to lay still long enough to be able to fall asleep. This ‘painsomnia’ really disrupted my internal body clock and hormones, and aggravated the complete exhaustion, brain fog and aching muscles I was experiencing. I also missed school, my friends and my hobbies, which made me feel really sad, frustrated and hopeless at times.
At first, doctors couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. My tests came back with some abnormalities, but nothing that could explain all my symptoms – at least not at that time.
Then, I read a book that happened to have a checklist with symptoms for ME/CFS - this was before the Internet was common in households – and I could tick off so many boxes, that we consulted a specialist in Brussels. After many more physical and psychological examinations, I was diagnosed with ME/CFS and fibromyalgia.
For years, I tried everything I could to get better, from a stay at a physical rehabilitation centre and an intense antibiotics program that sadly only destroyed my gut microbiome to alternative remedies. But nothing really cured my health, nor did it take my pain and fatigue away.
Thankfully, I somehow did manage to pass my final exams and finish school through self-study. All my friends went off to university and college, but I was still stuck at home. One day when I was 18, as I was getting ready to visit yet another doctor in the hopes of finding some relief, I suddenly had had enough. I didn’t want to spend the little energy I had on hospital visits, therapies and talking about my symptoms any more. I want to live life – with and despite of my health problems. So with support of my parents, I cancelled that appointment and really shifted my focus from trying to get better to getting things done with chronic illness.
“...it was time to try to get to a higher level of functioning again – and hopefully become well and fit enough to become a mom someday.”
Living life with chronic illness
I started studying Psychology via the Dutch Open University, part-time, from home and at my own pace. Every now and then, I would push myself hard to be able to attend dance classes and have fun with friends, even though I often needed days to recover afterwards. By getting a dorm room in a different city, I had to figure out how to cook dinner, clean and get groceries on high-pain and low-energy days.
When I was 23, I met my now husband and we started building our life together. But as we travelled to some amazing destinations and I did my Psychology internship with lots of commuting, my physical limitations started to get in the way of living life. So after we got married, it was time to try to get to a higher level of functioning again – and hopefully become well and fit enough to become a mom someday.
“I’m so incredibly happy that I now can actively play with my kids, go on day trips without any trouble and work part-time as a psychologist on The Health Sessions”
My own definition of recovery
Traditionally, recovery means you try to get back to your former state of health after illness injury or addiction. But after being sick for almost 15 years, focusing on fully healing didn’t feel realistic. So I created my own definition of recovery, like being able to walk 5km and work part-time without frequent flare-ups and setbacks, with an action plan to go along with it.
I adopted an anti-inflammatory diet, based on the principles of dr. Andrew Weil and Patrick Holford, to help reduce the chronic inflammation in my joints. To get into a deep state of relaxation that supports healing, I had regular massages and acupuncture sessions. I had always hated having to rest and resisted doing it, but then I started to see it as an essential part of my recovery plan. Mindful micro-breaks – with breathing exercises, short meditations or body scans – became an automatic way to recharge throughout the day. What’s more, I designed my own walk training program to very slowly but steadily increase my mobility and fitness.
It took me almost two years, but all of these lifestyle strategies combined helped me to taper off my medications for juvenile rheumatism and became healthy enough to start a family.
To my luck, the hormone levels of being pregnant and breastfeeding actually improved my health. Because your body has to accept the foreign DNA of your baby, your immune system usually dials down a notch –which in my case meant less autoimmune problems and less inflammation. (Don’t get me wrong, definitely not every woman with chronic illness or autoimmune disorders feels better during pregnancy – plenty feel worse - so I was very fortunate).
And as my two children grew older, my activity level grew with them – from baby steps to exploring the world around us. I’m so incredibly happy that I now can actively play with my kids, go on day trips without any trouble and work part-time as a psychologist on The Health Sessions, my website dedicated to helping others cope well with the emotional, cognitive and practical aspects of living with chronic illness.
Being sick for so many years did leave its marks on my body and brain, and there are still some things I cannot do. I still do (automatically) pace my energy and use planning skills to make life more effortless wherever possible. But I no longer meet the diagnostic criteria for any illness (except asthma) and I no longer feel ill.
Nowadays, I still try to improve my well-being and fitness levels by spending time in nature and ‘exercise snacking’ – adding small bursts of movement into your day instead of longer workouts – but in my mind, I’ve reached my own definition of recovery, and I’m proud how far I’ve come.
